EP 8 : Old cow ating young grass
I told my Mom he had proposed to me and she asked “What is he like".
“You know that he’s a Doctor he is very tall and very handsome and if we marry we would produce beautiful babies, but my only concern is, he has a short temper". Mom said, that the bad temper would change after he married and especially with kids. I waited for 23 years and he didn’t change, he got worse,thanks mom!
After one month of marriage, one day his temper rose again, he was furious and enraged by a tiny issue and he smashed up everything in the kitchen. I was shocked and scared and quivering with fear, I called my dad to ask for help. My father came as quickly as he could and took me home. I’m not sure but I think because he had “lost face” a few months later he said we were moving to Kaohsiung away from my parents. When my Dad took me home he was so worried for my security and safety, we had a family meeting and I decided I wanted a divorce, I could not five with this man and his temper. My parent’s priority was my safety and they agreed. Maybe that incident and my parent’s response caused him to lose face, but from that day on there was always a barrier between them.
My Godmother Miss Roberts had played matchmaker at our wedding and she told him I wanted a divorce,his reply was “Too soon to get divorced, I don’t agree", he refused the divorce, Miss Roberts returned with the message and she tried to mediate saying as a Christian I should love him with Christian’s Love him and find it in my heart to forgive him, try harder to understand him. All her efforts were to try and convince me not to divorce, be tolerant and patient. My heart softened, I forgave him.
After 3 months he got the new job in Kaohsiung, his home town. I quit my job and followed him, leaving my family in Chang-hua. I wanted to work again, but he asked me to stay as a house wife and telling me " It’s dangerous outside if you are not careful, someone might abduct you".
Although he was handsome he had grey hair since his late twenties and that just emphasized an age gap between us. Others often thought he was an elderly relative and that made him feel insecure and in turn, that put pressure on me though his anxiety. Some of the Doctors and his medical colleagues used to tease him, an old cow eating young grass’. That definitely did not help me, I was the one that suffered the results of these jokes.
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